Ladies -- This is for your husbands

Today, I'm going to offer my readers a letter that I recently read on Facebook. It's from a man whose wife helped him to become whole foods, plant-based. As a result of doing so, this particular man realized how important that change to WFPB was. And he recognized those kinds of things that might hold a man back from doing so. To help other men, he wrote this letter.

He captured it so well and because of that I wanted to share it with my readers. So, I contacted the author and received permission to reprint this letter. But I was asked to keep it anonymous. Therefore, I'm re-printing it with no names.

This letter could be the impetus that saves your husband's life. It's that important. So, please, please give it to your husband if he is being resistant to adapting the whole foods, plant-based lifestyle. Here it goes:

Man To Man
As we’re growing up we get the idea that adults get to do anything they want. That only lasts so long and then the commitments start to get made. We commit to our children. We commit to our spouses and we have responsibilities. More and more, our lives seem to get away from us as our responsibilities take over. One of the biggest things we don’t want to let go of is our opportunity to eat whatever we want because that seems to hurt nobody. We don’t think we’re detracting from our responsibilities to anybody else with what we eat - until what we eat starts to take its toll.
Advertising tells us to be men we need to eat meat. We need to eat “hearty” meals, meals that will sustain us out in the cold, harsh environment. Oddly enough, many of us don’t ever even go out into any harsh environments, but we still have that macho image. We have these manly ideas of stalking food out in the wild and taking down an elk and cooking it on a campfire. We get a taste for meat and pork and barbeque and sausage and “man-sized” portions and we don’t want that wimpy rabbit food. We keep these images in our minds. They are fueled by the commercials we see and what society tells us a real man does and thinks and eats. We become lemmings to those concepts and those marketing ploys and think less for ourselves about what we really need. We become so programmed, we are ignoring the fact that we’re disabling ourselves. As this happens, our world shrinks. If we were active, we have fewer things that we can enjoy. Our appetite is the easiest thing to continue to satisfy.
The problem with all this is that remember all those responsibilities we’ve taken on? We become less able to fulfill them as we become more disabled from the foods we’re eating. And we grouse about it and complain about it and eventually we may even go to the doctor. And what does the doctor tell us? Oh, it’s because we’re getting older, it’s genetic, it’s not our fault. Take these pills and the problems will go away. But the pills only make the problems feel like they’ve gone away They’re still there, they just don’t hurt as much. But, it’s still building up in our bloodstream, still clogging our arteries, still causing heart problems. Throw in sleep disorders. Now it starts slowing down our mental processes so that we’re even less active and less able to come up with good solutions. But what do we still have to enjoy? Those foods. The ones that are really causing the most problems. Add in the weight problems and our knees start going to hell. We don’t even want to stand up from the couch anymore because it hurts so much. Eventually, those knees are bone on bone. Now we’re talking disability.
Let’s talk about gout. Let’s talk about pain. Have you ever felt pain? I remember waking up in the middle of the night whimpering like a baby, tears coming down my eyes because the damn sheet touched my toe. Yeah, that’s manly. I was real macho right then. If you’ve ever been there, you know exactly what I’m talking about. Alright, you wake up the next morning - maybe the pain is better but you can’t get your damn foot in the shoe. Now what? You can’t go to work because even if you’re going to hobble around it still hurts. That’s REAL manly. You’re now disabled. All because you wanted to eat what you wanted to eat. Nice work.
Often the woman in our lives can see what’s happening to us more objectively. If they have any understanding of these things, they might be trying to tell you at this point that you need to change your diet. The worst thing you can do is look at it as if she is trying to control you. I’ve been there myself and one of the first reactions puts us in mind of being controlled children again. She’s not the adult trying to take control of you as a child. Stop looking at it like that. Stop trying to be that man who will not be controlled. Look at the situation and recognize that you need to take control of this problem that is now plaguing you. You need to let her help you but recognize it’s your decision and you are in control and stop resisting.
You may not want to feel controlled by her, but if you think about where this is all leading, you are forcing her to be your caretaker down the road - instead of being the man you wanted to be when you originally committed to her and wanted to take care of her. It’s not enough to make commitments. We need to put ourselves in the position to make following up on those commitments sustainable. If you follow the typical macho male diet, you are actually doing the reverse. You are setting your course to be depending on others, especially your wife. Who will have the control then?
One of our prime roles is being a man to our woman and taking care of her. Eventually what we do with our food and what our food does to us is to cause us to be less functional, less able to take care of our woman. This leaves her feeling less protected and less cared for. What is manly about that? I’m sure most of you, if you had been able to think it through ahead of time, would never had wanted the scenario to play out this way. But that’s what you are doing, bite by bite, and by dismissing the idea that you can, over the long term, have a positive effect on your life by making the right choices.
It’s not just aging. It’s not just genetics. It’s what we do to ourselves and we need to take control back and act like men and not spoiled children.
So, it’s time to get ourselves back on track so that we can function properly and fulfill those commitments which make us the macho men we want to be instead of lemmings that allow ourselves to be led by the nose by commercials and doctors and the notions we had as children. It’s time to be real grown-ups and think for ourselves.
Your wife is trying to help save you and you need to take control of yourself because she can’t do it for you. You need to be the one that decides to make yet one more commitment and this one is to yourself. You need to pull yourself up by the bootstraps, get your head screwed on straight, recognize that it’s your life you are in control of and get it back on track. She will be there to help you with the foods she prepares but it has to be your decision.
If you’re smart enough and independent enough, you need to stop listening to commercially-driven messages and learn how to think for yourself. You need take it all in and realize that something does have control of your life and it’s not you. It’s that one pleasure that you keep giving yourself. That one pleasure that’s nagging at your body and bringing you down – making you less of a man, rather than more, in all the ways that really count.
Hopefully, you can come to this realization before any real heavy permanent damage is done and take control of your life again. BE a man. Take the bull by the horns and do the thing that you’ve learned to do over the whole course of your life. Don’t take the easy way out. This is going to be hard. It’s not going to be the most fun thing you ever did, but it will get you back on track. You can start enjoying your life the way you used to again, minus this one damn pleasure. You need to give up all those “manly” foods and do what your body needs.
Take the hard road. Bite the bullet instead of the barbeque. Save your body so that you can fulfill those responsibilities you decided you were going to commit to. That’s what being a man is – not acting like a cartoon character in somebody else’s commercial!